The Illuminati’s Secret Celebrity Murder and Cloning Centers, Explained

Queen Elizabeth, the Clone-Loving Bitch

The Illuminati’s Secret Celebrity Murder and Cloning Centers, Explained


Have you ever noticed that, sometimes, a certain celebrity seems ever so slightly off? Maybe its an errant beauty mark or the fact that their eyelids have begun to blink sideways. You can feel in your heart that something’s just not right. That’s because your darling idol is dead.

Don’t worry, though, because before they were killed, your favourite celebrity was cloned. Which means that unlike Paul McCartney (who was simply replaced with a lookalike), countless incarnations of your dearly departed could be walking among us for centuries to come.

But how do we know this? Why would anyone let this happen? And am I okay? As far as the first two are concerned, a man named Donald Marshall has the answers. The latter is anyone’s guess.

Queen Elizabeth, the Clone-Loving Bitch

As he revealed on Facebook in 2011, Donald Marshall, a clone himself, is an otherwise normal guy who had the bad luck of finding himself in a so-called “cloning station” run by Queen Elizabeth. When Marshall was born, his family was already living in the cloning center. Yet in all his writings and interviews, he never specifies exactly why his family lived in this clandestine Illuminati palace in the first place. Details, details.

Still, Marshall’s discussions on the matter have been extensive. A Google search for “Donald Marshall cloning” brings up about 230,000 different results, many of which weren’t even written by Marshall himself. Nearly every clone-related conspiracy blog out there has discussed him or his tale, and it’s hard to find a video that makes mention of celebrity cloning without alluding to some aspect of the Donald Marshall canon.


The basics of his story (which do occasionally shift) go something like this: During his time at the cloning station, Marshall discovered that the entire operation is run by a collective consisting of the Freemasons, a group called “The Vril Society,” and of course, Scientologists. This secret society super-group is what we know today as the ever-elusive Illuminati.

Members of the Illuminati (which naturally include all the G20 world leaders) typically meet in subterranean bunkers. The very same bunkers that, according to Marshall, house what has become a highly lucrative network of celebrity cloning farms.

The cloning part of the operation didn’t actually start until some time after World War II, at which point, and as Marshall explains in his Facebook post, “The political people started bringing movie stars and musicians there to hang around with them, they can control who remembers the cloning facility and who will remain oblivious even though not remembering still damages you.”

Some of these clones are used for mere entertainment value (gladiator-style wrestling bouts, sexual perversions, Illuminati ritual sacrifices, what have you). Others are kept as precautionary measures should the clone’s original ever need a new liver. If you saw 2005 sci-fi flick The Island, you already know exactly what I’m talking about—because, in a fit of hubris, The Island was produced by none other than the Illuminati themselves.


Organ harvesting is the least of your worries as a clone, though. In his original tell-all Facebook post from 2011, Marshall explained:

The royal family of England,… yes Queen Elizabeth, Phillip Duke of Edinburgh and Prince Charles are the worst of them, unbelievable depraved perverts all showing off for the celebrities that go there, Elizabeth has the children there call her “lillibet” and does ungodly things to them, some she fakes being nice to, some she is terrible to, cutting them with swords while they scream, the decent people that are there against their will are afraid to say anything against them, most have their children there as a kind of hostage, to be torn apart if they even think of informing anyone, but as they have been torturing me terribly anyway I will tell all, Vladamir Putin loves to put the fear of torture and death into people but is essentially a cowardly pervert himself.

Most of the famous people are ashamed to speak or be seen by me there very much,as they’re ashamed of the perverse and disgusting gatherings, I am a decent person and will not participate in these acts, so they use me as an example and torture me for my being a good person.

Just like with twins or Real Dolls, if you torture a person’s clone, the original will feel it and might even undergo physical damage. Each new clone decreases your mental capacity, as well, so the more clones made, the easier that person is to hurt or subdue. Two of Queen Elizabeth’s favorite pastimes.

And as all the pros know, if you really want to keep someone under your thumb, all you have to do is kill the original copy. Clones are notoriously obedient, which apparently comes in handy when you need them to churn out hit single after hit single. Don’t take my word for it, just ask Avril‘s clone—or any of the other high profile clones below.

Britney Spears

Britney Spears is dead. That is, assuming the now-defunct (but accessible here) website isn’t lying to us.

Because back in 1998, right before dropping the now-classic rock opera Baby One More Time, Britney and Justin Timberlake got into a particularly nasty car accident that resulted in severe burns on Justin’s part and an unfortunate case of decapitation on Britney’s. (Justin is still in a coma; his clone roams free.)

Because pop stars must have heads, the label was forced to find a Britney Spears stand-in. This is where the stories begin to diverge. claims that the label’s producers went to the mall and found a young look-a-like named Britney Shears. This seems unlikely and leaves us with only one possibility: Donald Marshall was right.

It was time to clone Britney.

And according to Marshall, the tubes detailed in the video look “exactly” like the real tubes in the cloning center.


Over the years, plenty of Britney clones have come and gone, which would explain her many emotional ups and downs. According to Marshall, though, at any given time there are at least two to five backup clones waiting underground for their turn in the spotlight.

Like any clone, the Britney copies are not at all happy with their lot in life. So in 2009’s “Break the Ice,” one of the songs written for Britney by Donald Marshall during his time as a pop clone lyricist, she managed to sneak in some hints at the reality of her situation. This included an accompanying animated video that depicts her blowing up an actual cloning center.


Why Queen Elizabeth and the rest of her Illuminati cohorts would allow a menial clone to expose the secrets of their arcane operation, however, remains a mystery.


There have long been rumors that Eminem checked himself into rehab after a drug overdose in 2005. He even said a few years ago that he “nearly died” at one point. He used the word “nearly,” of course, because when one is survived by innumerable copies of one’s former self, one can never really be dead.

When Slim Shady reached worldwide phenom status in the late 90s, the Illuminati approached him (as they do with all up and coming superstars) to see how willing he would be to join their gang of ultra-powerful miscreants. Shady foolishly declined and was thus sent off to meet his demise in a fatal car crash. Or as far as the rest of the world was concerned, Eminem went to “rehab.”

Of course, no clone is perfect. The video below, which is available for download here, goes so far as to point out the vocal disparities between the original Eminem and his counterpart.

And like noted clone Al Roker, Eminem’s clone once suffered a glitch on live television and nearly gave himself away in the process.

No doubt that clone was killed immediately after the interview aired. Embarrassing!


Miley Cyrus

Back in 2010, as with all incurably rebellious teen sensations, Disney had Miley Cyrus killed and dumped her remains in the California desert.

There are two different possible reasons for this. One theory states that in the months before her “accident,” Miley leaked nudes, smoked Salvia, and wrote in a song that she was “hot.” Which is to say, Miley Cyrus had become a national disgrace. To save its brand, Disney’s was left with only one option: Murder.

The other theory (and the one outlined in the image above) alleges that Miley Cyrus refused the sexual advances of various Disney executives (her father included). After realizing that Miley intended to remain steadfast in her decision not to partake in their blood orgies, a Disney higher-up beats her up, left her for dead, and brought in the clones.

The Miley Cyrus conspiracies actually go even deeper than the rest. This YouTube video claims to contain proof that Miley Cyrus is “a confirmed Draco Reptilian Shapeshifter Hybrid.” Note the eyelids.

THE FOLLOWING FEATURE IS A VIDEO ANALYSIS. Miley Cyrus is a confirmed Draco Reptilian Shapeshifter Hybrid. This is a video analysis of its eyes shapeshifting to reptilian eyes, blinking sideways!!!… Right on your face in HD! The eye anomalies only last just a few frames… Only can be seen in the live broadcast. After the live feed, all anomalies are cut off by the broadcaster… Stop looking for a few frames, that there are not in the video you watched over and over because isn’t live broadcast… She is blinking sideways again! Reptilians using liquid crystal holographic technology, Hybrids and Clones have been placed in strategic places to accomplish the NWO Agenda. Wake Up! This is an amazing liquid crystal polarization failure on HD! Reptilians use Liquid Crystal Holographic Technology to hide their real form… OPEN YOUR MIND!!! NOTA GLITCH!!! THEY operate in a lower frequency, in which our human senses can’t reach… CONDEMNATION WITHOUT INVESTIGATION IS THE HIGHEST FORM OF IGNORANCE. They Live! ACCEPT LORD CHRIST AS YOUR SAVIOR. I do not want Reptilians/Insectoids nor other Shapeshifter nor whatever other negative entities to comment/respond negatively in any way to this video nor any other of my videos! I do not want Reptilians/Insectoids nor other Shapeshifter nor whatever other negative entities to derail/negatively influence the discussions in the comment section of this nor any other of my videos. I do not want Reptilians/Insectoids nor other Shapeshifter nor whatever other negative entities to thumb up the negative comments/vote down the positive comments made by humans. I do not want Reptilians/Insectoids nor other Shapeshifter nor whatever other negative entities manipulate my view counters, my comment system, my private message system or any other function of my channel or the with me corresponding/interacting/linked channels in any way at all. I do not want Reptilians/Insectoids nor other Shapeshifter nor whatever other negative entities to report my video nor any of my other videos for whatever issue. I do not want to be annoyed by Reptilians/Insectoids nor other Shapeshifter nor whatever other negative entities with accounts copyright infringement nonsense. Who are you to claim copyright? You can’t. Everything produced on this planet belongs to us. You don’t have any rights here. All earth laws are written for earth humans. I do not want Reptilians/Insectoids nor other Shapeshifter nor whatever other negative entities to negatively influence humans to do any of the above mentioned to them, whether them being unaware of being influenced or being servants. I don’t want humans or whatever other life form does anything of the above mentioned either. If you do it nevertheless you’ll accumulate negative karma. If we will be victorious in this planetary conflict — and we will be — you will face justice in court if you engaged in the manipulation of my channel and negatively interfered with the awakening of humanity. And many of you will hang for it. Don’t touch my channel. Don’t touch my videos. Don’t manipulate others to do it for you. Hands off! Claws off! Feelers off! Tentacles off! Minds off!

Either way, whatever did replace end up replacing Miley is far more malicious than your typical clone. This Miley is mean.

Allow Donald Marshall to explain:


So does that mean that every celebrity we see is actually a clone suffering under Queen Elizabeth’s barbarous rule? Of course not. Not even the Queen Mother has the capacity to make that many celebrity doubles. But are most celebrities Illuminati clones? Almost certainly, yes.

Honorable mentions

[Those who have not yet been killed and replaced by clones but it’s only a matter of time]

  • Chloë Grace Moretz
  • Stephen Curry
  • James Franco
  • Oprah’s boyfriend Steadman
  • Steve Harvey
  • Dr. Oz
  • Gizmodo editor-in-chief Katie Drummond
  • Bono
  • Everyone you love
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Written by John Simone


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